Some marriages are not healthy and divorce is a good choice, a safe choice. Unfortunately, many others end in divorces, too, marriages that could have thrived again. Or they continue as pretense, for the kids, for the shared property, for the lack of financial options, even though they could have returned to loving, sharing, trusting relationships. If you’re not in immediate threat of death...
What does it mean to Assume Love? Technically, it means to suppose, think, or guess, without proof, that someone loves you. It’s not a bad guess if that someone has stood in front of your friends and family and pledged to love you as long as you both shall live. And yet most of us are given to wondering if they still love us, given what they just did or said or failed to say. When we are...
When one of you is laid off or seriously ill or grieving a parent’s recent death, both of you get stressed. So does your relationship. Choose carefully how to deal with each other. The last thing you need right now is to do a kindness for the other that gets rejected or sneered at. If your husband or wife is working extra hours to make up for your loss of income, it’s kind to take on...
Living together can feel simpler and safer than marriage, especially if you’ve watched your parent’s marriage come to an unhappy end. But is it? Living together means you are free to leave. You are free to leave if either of you is seriously injured or is diagnosed with a life-altering disease. But so is your partner. You are free to leave if your trust is tested. And it will be in...
Do you have a brother-in-law or sister-in-law you can count on? How about a sibling of your mother-in-law? Thank your marriage. Do you have big, warm holiday dinners with your extended family? Thank your marriage. Or your parents’ marriage. Or your siblings’ marriages. Marriage ties the knots in the net that protects us when we fall and that gives us something to hold onto as we climb...
